Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
