Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
