Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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