How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
