In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
