How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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