I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
