Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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