I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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