Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
