We're facebook friends in real life
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize