i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
