you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
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