I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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