I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
