margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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