We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize