Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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