If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I enjoy the company of your penis
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
