So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
