I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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