How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
