who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
