dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Randomize
