It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
