Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize