After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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