Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
