GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
