i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
