ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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