I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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