you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
