My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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