Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
MIDGETS
????
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
