I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
