She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
only if we run a train.
done.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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