Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
