ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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