Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
