Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
