yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
