I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize