whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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