the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Please don't give away my fajitas
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
