I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
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