I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
It's Friday. Sex?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
