You just made me feel so damn special
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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