just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
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