I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize