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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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